1795 May (early) (2)
(Anne)
Anne Andrews, Salisbury, to Maria Grace Andrews, Portsmouth [c. early May 1795].
Tuesday morning ½ past Six
I have no reason to assign for addressg my beloved Sister at this time but that of self indulgence I wish to say something to you tho’ at present I have but little idea what that something is to be to begin I can tell you what you have each time neglected to tell me that I am thro’ mercy tolerably well – my spirits as usual fluctuating and the frame of my mind tho’ somewhat discomposed by the trifling perplexities of things without, yet much more so by the workings of pride, unbelief & a worldly spirit within. Ah my friend when we shall quit this scene of vanity if admitted to the regions of blessedness how great, how awful, now sweet will be the change – no vain discourse shall fill our tongue &c When I review the past or present dealings of God with me there is much to excite my gratitude & rejoice my heart, but when I get beyond the limits which infinite wisdom hath prescribed and attempt to plan out futurity I smart for my folly & presumption the impenetrable mystery on whh it is involved reproved my pride & the fear & apprehension such searches beget in my mind effectually punished my unbelief – all I have said may be resolved into this, that I should be much more happy if I possest more conformity to the divine Will & that to have a mind kept in perfect peace as stayed on God comprehends the largest desires of my Soul as to this life – but I must forbear –
I feel at times very much inclined to repine at the very slow recovery of our dr friend but while as the Hymn says –
Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan his work in vain
God is his own Interpreter
And he will make it plain.
The Lord does nothing without design & his designs in afflicting his chosen are gracious but we are very unwilling to trust where we cannot trace be sure you let me hear from you again on Friday if not before –
You will say perhaps this is all very grave for a Wedding Day I crave pardon & entreat that you will convey suitable expressions of congratulation for me to the new married poor tho unknown tender to the Bride my offer’d love and assure her of my sincere desires that every pleasing expectation &c may not only be realized but exceeded – Mrs Marsh unites in good wishes &c: she begs love to all & would have written but was too much fatigued last night with walking – remember me most affectionately to my very dr Mrs Saffery also to Mr Saffery Mr & Mrs H [Horsey]– &c: –
Adieu my beloved may you have every desire of your heart granted whh hath a tendency to promote the glory of God & your own spiritual good – it is the sincere prayer of
Yours tenderly
Anne Andrews
Mr & Mrs H [Houghton] would be remembered
Hannah begs love –
Text: Timothy Whelan, gen. ed., Nonconformist Women Writers, 1720-1840, 8 vols. (London: Pickering & Chatto, 2011), vol. 6, pp. 92-93; Reeves Collection, Box 14.1.(q.), Bodleian Library, Oxford. Address: Miss Andrews. No postmark.