Anne Dutton, Great Gransden, to Howell Harris, London, 15 October 1742.

My very Dear, and much Honour’d Brother,

Grace unto You, and Peace be multiply’d.

I humbly Thank you for your dear Letters: They refresh’d my Bowels in ye Lord. Your inward Affection to Me, that Fellowship you have wth me in ye Truth, & yt Willingness wch is ^in^ yr Dear Heart, to Suffer a Child to cry Hosanna to ye Son of Lord’s Kingdom did much comfort my Soul. Oh my Brother, your acceptance of my weak Labours, & readiness to help me to serve my Dear Lord Jesus, in disposing of some of my poor Books, did very much affect me. God’s Kindness, in yours, struck my heart, and made me say, with David, Is this after ye Manner of Man, O Lord God? Oh, not after ye Manner of Men, hath ye LORD dealt with me; but according to his own Heart, hath He done all these great Things! I was under some Discouragement abt sending my last Books unto you. But was sweetly constrain’d thereto by some portions of Scripture. And many a Cry has my poor Soul put up to ye Lord, that I might find Favour wth Him, & in your Eyes, wth respect unto them. And therefore your receiving ye Books, Eyes, wth respect unto them. And therefore your receiving ye Books, with ye Contents of yr Last, wch Signify’d yr approbation of them, & having receiv’d benefit from them were exceeding delightful to me, as I view’d ye same as an Answer of Prayer. May ye Lord Reward all yr Kindness to me, an Hundred-fold into yr own Bosom!

As to myself, my Brother, I am a poor Sinner, saved by God’s Free-Grace, according to its own Riches! Oh what Wonders has God’s Free-Grace wrought for Me! how has He delighted to love Me! But oh, my Unkindness to my Kind Father, breaks my Heart! I am pained at my very Soul, to feel ye workings of Sin in my Corrupt Nature: And even Surprized to see such a Depth of Iniquity in my vile Heaert, after so long an Acquaintance wth JESUS, and such abundant so long an Acquaintance with JESUS, and such abundant so long an Acquaintance wth JESUS, and such abundant so long an Acquaintance wth JESUS, and such abundant Displays of Grace that I have been Favour’d with! And under this, I am frequently tempted to think that God will cast me off as to Usefulness, & Use, such a vile Sinner no more unto any of his Dear Children. And I am sure, that if He was not GOD, ye LORD yt changeth not; He would do it. And under ye View of my own Vileness, I ^also^ find an Aptness to sink into Dejection of Spirit. I find it exceeding Difficult to take in, & keep up a due Sight and Sense of Sin, without sinking into an unbelieving Heaviness, at such Times when my Soul is not sensibly under Those full & overflowing Tides of Love & Grace, which bear down all before them. Oh this Sin of Sins, Unbelief! It is ye Womb from whence all Sin Springs, and ye Gulph into which all Sin Flows! Satan stirs up ye Corruptions of ye Heart, all seated as it were in Unbelief, & tempt’s God’s People to Sin: and by ye Motions of other Sins, stirring, or yielded to, either more inwardly, or outwardly, He Tempts them to Unbelief. And this is ye worst Sin of all. In as much as ye Soul hereby, so far as it prevails, casts ye highest Dishonour upon the Grace of God, & ye Fulness of Christ: as if there was not Enough in the infinite Grace of JEHOVAH, in ye infinite Merit of  CHRIST’s Blood & Righteousness, and in ye infinite All-Sufficiency of his Fulness, to answer, ye Soul’s Wants, & even infinitely exceed them! Oh this Sin of Unbelief, this staying at Home in Self-Wretcheness, instead of going out to Christ, and to God in Him, so far as it prevails, is a tacit Rejecting of ye SAVIOUR, and of all ye Grace exhibited in Him, tacit Rejecting of ye SAVIOUR, and of all ye Grace exhibited in Him by ye glorious Gospel, for ye chief of Sinners! Happy should we be, if upon every Conviction of our own Emptiness & Vileness, we passd ye next Moment out of ourselves, into CHRIST, and there clos’d wth ye glorious Remedy provided for our miserable helpless Souls! Oh what a God-honouring, Soul-nourishing, & comforting Life, is a Life of Faith on ye Son of God! All Glory be to God’s Free-Grace, This, in ye main, is ye Life wch I now live in ye Flesh! But yet, to my Grief, I feel ye Secret Workings of Unbelief in my Soul, & yt I am Tempted to it, upon ye new Discoveries of my own Vileness. And under ye Views hereof, I am further Tempted to cast off ye Service of God, so far as it respects my making Mention of him to others; after this Manner: “You see how Vile you are; Say no ^more^ for God, Appear no further, keep Silence, unless you was better.” But oh, my Dear Lord doth not Leave me, to ye Power of these Temptations. In infinite Grace, He forgives all my Sins, & yet employs me in his Work! He appears again & again, to find me something to do for Him, and frequently gives me to Hear, that He does something by Me, vile Me, even when I have said, Time after time, I am cast out of his Sight! Oh Free Love! He shews me ye horrid Nature of Unbelief, & Strengthens my Soul to Believe on Him, for his Honour & my Joy, in ye Face of a Thousand Difficulties & Discouragements.  And by a sweet, alluring Language of his Love, He draws on my Soul to serve Him in ye Liberty of his Dear Children, and causes me to appear for Him in ye Work He calls me to, with an holy Bodlness, in his own Strength & Worthiness; notwithstanding all yt Vileness & Unworthiness wch I see in myself, & yt Satan objects against me. Oh my Brother, I see the whole of my Salvation, from first to last, in all, & every of its Parts, stands alone upon God’s rich, free sovereign Grace, Reigning in glorious Triumph thro’ a Crucify’d JESUS! This Grace began my Salvation in quickning me when Dead in Sin! This Grace has maintain’d, & increas’d my new Life hitherto, thro’ a Thousand Deaths and Dangers! And this same Grace, will carry me safe thro’ a World of Sin & Sorrow, into ye World of Glory, in its own Everlasting Arms!  Oh help me to Bless & Praise my God, for his Great Grace unto Me!

I Rejoyce much in our Lord’s Kindness to you, in yt He increaseth you wth all ye Increases of God. In yt He strengthens you with all Might by his Spirit in yr inward Man, makes you valiant for his Truth upon ye Earth, labourious in his Service, and abundantly Successful in your Labours. Go on, my Dear Brother, in ye Lord’s Strength to serve Him. Your Service is Acceptable to yr great Master, Profitable to his Dear Children, and Delightful to yr own Soul. Your Work is Honourable & Sweet; and yr Reward will be Great & Glorious. Oh Labour hard for CHRIST, according to his Working, in yr little Inch of Time: an Eternity of Rest awaits you in His, & in his Father’s Bosom! The Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be wth your Spirit. I forget you not before the Lord. Pray for,

   Dear Sir,

           Yours Affectionately 

in our Glorious Head,

                              Anne Dutton.

Great Gransden,

Oct. 15, 1742.

My Spouse & Friends Salute you most kindly. And Glad shd we be to see you here, if ye Master’s Work permit it. If You incline to come, acquaint us [paper smudged]

P.S. Providence having opened a Door for some of my books to be sent into America; I humbly beg ye help of yr Prayers for a Blessing upon them. We recd ye full Money for ye bound Books you took, of Dr Mr Whitefield. I have sent A Letter to Mr Wesley, & A Letter to ye Saints to Br Lewis. If you cou’d dispose of any of ’em while in London, I hope you wd thereby serve ye Lord Jesus. Adieu.

Address: To | The Revd Mr Howel Harris |in | London

Endorsement: Sistr Dutton | Octr 15 42

Text: C. M. Archives, Trevecka MSS, Letter 693, National Library of Wales, Aberystwyth.  

Anne Dutton, Great Gransden, to Howell Harris, London, 15 October 1742.

Oct. 15, 1742.

My very dear and much honour’d Brother,

Grace unto you, and Peace be multiplied.

        I humbly thank you for your dear Letters: They refreshed my Bowels in the Lord. Your inward Affection to me; that Fellowship you have with me in the Truth; and that Willingness which is in your Heart, to suffer a Child to cry, Hosanna to the Son of David! and especially the Hints you gave of the Coming of our Lord’s Kingdom, did much comfort my Soul. O my dear Brother, your Acceptance of my weak Labours, and Readiness to help me to serve my dear Lord Jesus, did very much affect me! God’s Kindness in yours, struck my Heart, and made me say with David, Is this after the Manner of Man, O Lord God? Oh, not after the Manner of Men hath the Lord dealt with me, but according to his own Heart, hath he done all these great Things!

        As to myself, my dear Brother, I am a poor Sinner, saved by God’s free grace, according to its own Riches! O what Wonders has God’s Free-Grace wrought in me! How has he delighted to love me! But, O my Unkindness to my kind Father, breaks my Heart! I am pained at the very Soul, to feel the Workings of Sin in my corrupt Nature; and even surprised to see such a Depth of Iniquity in my vile Heart, after so long an Acquaintance with Jesus, and such abundant Displays of Grace that I have been favour’d with! And under this I am frequently tempted to think that God will cast me off as to Usefulness (and use such a vile [63] Sinner no more) unto any of his dear Children. And I am sure that if he was not God, the LORD that changeth not, he would do it. And under the Views of my own Vileness, I also find an Aptness to sink into Dejection of Spirit: I find it exceeding difficult to take in, and keep up a due Sight and Sense of Sin, without sinking into an unbelieving Heaviness, at such Times when my soul is not sensibly under those full and overflowing Tides of Love and Grace, which bear down all before them. O this Sin of Sins, Unbelief! It is the Womb from whence all our Sin springs, and the Gulph into which all Sin flows! Satan stirs up the Corruption of the Heart, all seated as it were in Unbelief, and tempts God’s People to Sin: And by the Motions of other Sins stirring, or yielding to, either more inwardly, or outwardly, he tempts them to Unbelief. And this is the worst Sin of all: Inasmuch as the Soul hereby, so far as it prevails, casts the highest Dishonour upon the Grace of God, and the Fulness [64] of Christ: As if there was not enough in the infinite Grace of Jehovah, in the infinite Merit of Christ’s Blood and Righteousness, and the infinite All-sufficiency of his Fulness to answer the Soul’s Wants, and even infinitely exceed them! Oh, this Sin of Unbelief! This staying at Home in Self-wretchedness, instead of going out to Christ, and to God in Him, so far as it prevails, is a tacit rejecting of the Saviour, and of all the Grace exhibited in Him by the glorious Gospel, for the Chief of Sinners! Happy should we be, if upon every Conviction of our own Emptiness and Vileness, we pass’d the next Moment out of ourselves, into Christ, and there closed with the glorious Remedy provided for our miserable helpless Souls! Oh what a God-honouring, Soul-nourishing, and comforting Life is a Life of Faith on the Son of God! All Glory be to God’s Free-Grace, This, in the Main, is the Life I now live in the Flesh! But yet to my Grief, I feel the Workings of Unelief in my Soul, and that I [65] am tempted to it upon the new Discoveries of my own Vileness. And under the Views hereof, I am farther tempted to cast off the Service of God, so far a it respects my making Mention of him to others; after this Manner, You see how vile you are; Say no more for God; appear no farther; keep silence, unless you was better. But Oh, my dear Lord doth not leave me to the Power of those Temptations. In infinite Grace he forgives all my Sins, and yet employs me in his Work! He appears again and again, to find me something to do for Him, and frequently gives me to hear, That He does something by me, vile me, even when I have said Time after Time, I am cast out of his Sight! O Free Love! He shews me the horrid Nature of Unbelief, and strengthens my Soul to believe on Him, for his Honour and my Joy, in the midst of a thousand Difficulties and Discouragements. And by the sweet alluring Language of his Love, he draws on my Soul to serve him, in  the Liberty of his dear Children; and causes [66] me to appear for Him in the Work He calls me to, with an holy Boldness in his own Strength and Worthiness, notwithstanding all that Vileness and Unworthiness which I see in myself; and that Satan objects against me. O my Brother, I see the Whole of my Salvation, from first to last, in all and every of its Parts, stands alone upon God’s Rich, Free, and Sovereign Grace, Reigning in glorious Triumph through a crucify’d JESUS! This Grace began my Salvation in quickening me, when I was dead in Sin! This Grace has maintain’d, and increased my new Life hitherto, through a thousand Deaths and Dangers! and this same Grace will carry me safe thro’ a World of Sin and Sorrow, into the World of Glory, in its own Everlasting Arms! O help me to bless and praise my God for his great Grace unto me!

        I rejoice much in our Lord’s Kindness to you, in that he increaseth you with all the Increase of God: In that he strengthens you with all Might by his Spirit in the inward Man; making [67] you valiant for his Truth upon the Earth, laborious in his Service, and abundantly successful in your Labours. Go on, my dear brother, in the Lord’s Strength to serve him! Your Service is acceptable to your great Master, profitable to his dear Children, and delightful to your own Soul. Your Work is honourable and sweet; and your Reward will be Great and Glorious. O labour hard for Christ, according to his Working, in your little Inch of Time: An Eternity of Rest awaits you in His, and in his Father’s Bosom! The Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your Spirit. I forget you not before the Throne of Grace. Pray for,

         Dear Sir,   

                           Yours Affectionately

                                         in our Glorious Head.

Text: “The Copy of a Letter from a Friend in the Country, to Brother Howell Harris in London,” in The Weekly History: or, An Account of the Most Remarkable Particulars relating to the Present Progress of the Gospel, ed. John Lewis (London: Printed and Sold by John Lewis, in Bartholomew-Close, near West-Smithfield, 1742), Vol. II, no. 1, pp. 61-67.